Trigger Happy

What if you decided today to welcome pain? Our natural proclivity is to resist pain. We all have triggers that engage our own personal fears.  We stop ourselves from getting into a relationship or trying something new for fear of failure or rejection.  We remember a time when we were let down by someone or a situation didn’t work out in our favor.  We start to feel those feelings again.  It is quite painful. It actually feels like the end of the world.  We are then consumed by the thoughts and emotions associated with this particular fear.  It can swallow you up very quickly.  I have the good old fear of abandonment program running.  If I feel like I have opened up to someone and it feels like they are pulling away my ego kicks in.  It either wants to cling to the person or run far away.  Those are the two options to protect it from being abandoned.  There is another option and it is so much easier.  It might not feel like it and I promise you that your ego will want to fight this.  It is possible to see the pain as it it comes up and tell yourself things like “oh, this is my old pattern coming up”.   Then say “I am just going to relax and let this be here for a while”. See it as a passing event and however it turns out I will be ok.  It sounds really simple and it is.  You must however actually do it and be so present when these feeling arise.  Catching it in the first moment you feel the heat rising is the way to really change the course of your behavior.  The secret is you have to WANT to change.  Do you really want to feel better? Do you believe that you can?  Do you want to live in peace, joy and harmony? If you do, then do the simple thing.  Relax around your triggers.