Forgetting and Remembering…

I am utterly in love with awakening and healing and yet it can be so painful to see your wounds in all of their disgusting glory.  I forget all too often on this journey, I must admit. The moments of remembering just how truly divine I am are the greatest blessings. I say to myself “Oh that is who I am, how could I forget again”.  My feelings of separateness fade away and I am washed in love.  I believe this remembering and forgetting is a part of this shift.  I know this because every single moment is exactly the perfect unfolding of our experience. I am watchful to this knowing, the signs are ubiquitous.  I remember that you are me and I am you.  When I condemn another, I condemn myself.  Your heart is my heart.  When I feel this love, the compassion in my heart in unbearable.  For soon, we will not be afraid anymore.  We will remember and bask in the unity for a great while.  Remaining unattached, knowing that the cycle will end and begin again.

Welcome

If you have read my other blog entries then you probably get the sense I am curious and intrigued by darkness.  I feel it deeply and have a passion for understanding it.  I have come to learn and accept that it is necessary. I received a feeling during a moment of darkness that felt warming, almost as if I enjoyed the pain?  I felt as though I was welcoming it.  I was not resisting it, but not only that, I was enjoying it.  Recognizing that the darkness is a part of me on a deeper level than I had previously known.  We all have shadow parts of ourselves and we have been conditioned to feel shame around our dark parts.  This shame separates us from each other, we feel isolated.  Its as if no one had ever felt the pain that we are feeling, which is so far from truth. We begin to honor each part of ourselves, remembering that none of it is us.  The true self is nothingness.  It can be hard to grasp this when we have been trained to be so involved in physical form and dismissing the other side, which is spirit.  Can we begin to welcome it all, enjoy it all?  Learn to be ok with the fact that really we are nothingness?